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One question I’m frequently asked is: what exactly is coaching? Many people, if they’ve heard the term, probably did so in the context of sports coaching. You may have a picture of an angry middle-aged man yelling orders at kids as he relives he glory days on the field or court, and you may be thinking, “I don’t want anything to do with that!”

I don’t blame you! If that was the idea behind coaching, I wouldn’t want anything to do with it either! (And, if you ever hire a coach who behaves like that, it’s a pretty big red flag that they may not have done much training or credentialing towards figuring out what we mean by coaching!)

What is Coaching?

The International Coaching Federation, the largest and oldest professional credentialing organization for coaches in the world, defines coaching as “partnering with clients in a thought-provoking and creative process that inspires them to maximize their personal and professional potential.” A coach, then, rather than acting as an expert who will tell you what to do, works with you to find ways to bring out the best in you.

In this way, rather than being the man on the field barking orders, you might think of a coach as the wise sagea who quietly listens as you sort through issues important to you. Rather than acting as the person who knows what is best for you, the coach trusts that you were born with wisdom within you, knowing exactly what you need, and sometimes it just takes someone asking the right questions to bring out the best in you.

In fact, many times, you will know more about the subject matter than your coach: you are the expert on your life! In fact, many coaching clients come with at least a general idea of what they want to talk about! It may be that they’re having difficulty defining their goals, taking action, or holding themselves accountable to the issue. Coaching can help with that!

What Does Coaching Look Like?

In a coaching session, I’ll start by asking what you hope to get out of our time together. The are our goals, and it’s perfectly okay for these to shift, change, or expand during our session. I’ll then ask you to tell me about the issue at hand. I’ll ask you questions to find out more about your issue and what’s preventing you from taking action. Towards the end of the session, I’ll ask what action you plan on taking and how you intend to be accountable for it. We’ll then decide if you’re ready to schedule another session, or if you want to wait and allow the issue to percolate a bit.

Often, coaching can be completed in five or fewer sessions, but we can always talk about it if you’d like to develop an ongoing relationship or if you have a more complicated issue.

What Are the Different Types of Coaching?

When you’re researching coaches, you’ll hear about different specialties in coaching. But what do they mean?

Most people, if they’ve heard of coaching, have heard of life coaching. As the name implies, life coaches help people sort through issues that come up in their lives, from relationship issues to practical issues that may pop up in their lives. Life coaches are a flexible bunch, willing to take up whatever issues are popping up in their clients’ personal and professional lives.

Rather than coaching one person at a time, team coaches work with groups of people who may be facing similar or conflicting issues. A good team coach is able to juggle the group in a way that helps the group mine wisdom from within.

One type of coaching I specialize in is clergy coaching, which, as the name suggests, is about walking with members of the clergy to find wisdom and action for their personal and professional lives. Clergy coaches are often clergy themselves and know the challenges inherent in ministry. Clergy coaches may also offer congregational coaching, where professional and lay leaders within a parish are coached on issues within their congregation, either as an individual or as a team.

You might also hear the term executive coaches, who specialize in helping people succeed as business leaders.

In addition, you will likely encounter a myriad of other specialties of coaching, including relationship coaches, career coaches, mental health coaches, fitness coaches, and communication coaches. These coaches may have additional training and/or experience in these niche fields and be able to help you reach your goals.

How Do I Choose a Coach?

In the United States, coaching is currently an unregulated field. As a result, anyone can hang up a sign and call themselves a coach. So how do you pick a coach with enough training to ensure you will reach your goals?

Most legitimate coaches will offer a free consultation so you can ask them questions and get to know their approach. If they don’t, ask why.

In this consultation, ask them about their training and credentials. Credentials from an organization such as the International Coaching Federation are a sign that the coach has passed rigorous training requirements and has extensive experience, as well as a commitment to a code of ethical conduct. If the coach isn’t credentialed, are they working on their credentials? And have they received training from an accreddited program to provide them with the skills necessary to coach effectively?

Be suspicious of any coach who can’t tell you about their training and experience. And if their only training is through a weekend seminar or the “school of life,” ask them how they’re qualified to journey with you.

Next, ask them about their approach. Good coaches don’t give a lot of homework between sessions but let action grow organically through your sessions. I’ve also heard it said that, in a healthy coaching relationship, the client should be doing 80% of the talking while the coach talks no more than 20%. If the coach does a lot of talking, especially telling stories about their lives rather than asking questions about you, are they really equipped to understand your goals?

If you know what you want to be coached on, you may also ask if they have any experience coaching in your area of need. Though this isn’t essential, it can reveal a good match in the long run.

If you’re still unsure, the International Coaching Federation’s Find a Coach tool can be a great tool to help you find an ICF credentialed coach!


Coaching can be a valuable tool for helping you achieve your goals in both your personal and professional lives. If you’re looking for a coach, I’d be honored to be considered as a part of your support team! Schedule a FREE consultation with me today and let’s see if we’d be a good match to work together!

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